Oh Dear, it's been a while

Sorry about that. To be honest....I've just felt horrible. I haven't felt good enough to write or read. I've been battling some major irritability and well....depression. I HATE to say that, admit it. I have felt so bad. Muscle aches, hurting in my joints. I was convinced it was my thyroid.

Finally, after two batches of blood work it was discovered that I have a severe Vitamin D deficiency.

I was SO glad when they found this. I do believe my dh and my doctor thought that I was on the verge of having some sort of breakdown. I know I sure felt like I was losing my mind but I knew there was something wrong with me and that it wasn't all in my head. It was just so hard getting others to believe me...until they found it. My have I been rejoicing!

Heaven is doing well. She was 24 weeks today. And guess what?? Guess what we found out at her sonogram? I should have shared already and I thought about it countless times but I was surely convinced I'd cry though the whole thing just as I've done almost every day for the last while so I didn't.

Heaven is having................

a baby boy!

Can you imagine?

How sweet God is.

I've prayed all these years for a son. Even year before last I was trying so hard to conceive and now just a mere 2 years later I'm getting a grandson. I'm so happy. There just aren't any words to express.

My brother and his fiance just had a baby boy on Monday. They named him Derron Valor. He is BEAUTIFUL. I'm not exaggerating either. He is BEAUTIFUL. Oh, it was so awesome to hold him and breath in his newborn scent. Nothing in the world beats that.

Here he is:

It was a bittersweet day. We arrived at the hospital around 7:30 am and awaiting his birth which came quickly. He was born by c-section around 8:00 am. After we seen him and took his gorgeous pictures we went upstairs on a different floor in the hospital where my sweet precious grandmother was. I had visited her on Friday too and I hadn't seen her since Christmas. She fussed at me for being slack and not coming sooner. (I just couldn't, I was so emotional and going through so much mentally that I couldn't bare to see her or poppa in the state/shape they were in.) On Monday when we all went up she called us each by name and hugged us. I was the last one. Everyone else had left the room already. She asked me for a hug. I kissed on her cheek because she had an oxygen mask hooked up to her and lots of wires and things. She said, "No, I didn't say a kiss, I said I wanted a hug." I hugged her and she said, "I want a good hug." So I reached around all the garb and hugged her precious neck so tight. She said, "Now that was a good hug!" Then she told me just as she had the rest of the family that was there to see her that day that she was tired and wanted to be left alone. She said, "I'm going to take me a nap."

"Okay Nannie, you sleep and we'll bring the baby up in just a little bit to see you." I told her. She shook her head okay.

We went back down to the birthing center and went in to see my brother's fiance and new son. It hadn't been 10 minutes when they came to tell us that she had passed away.

We had her funeral on Wednesday. It was a long day. Full of sorrow and yet full of comfort and joy.

The hardest part was seeing my pa. He and my nannie would have been married 65 years on July 6th. Can you imagine spending 65 years with someone and then having to watch them die before you? His pain broke my heart.

I knew nannie was ready to go and I knew she was suffering. I was able to let her go with a sigh of relief that she wouldn't have to fight for another breath.

It's been an emotional time. I'll catch up with you ladies soon. If I cross your mind please keep me and my family in your prayers.

Thanks